


can we simply starve this sin?

by modricistas (mincolla)



Category: Men's Football RPF
Genre: Age Difference, Alternate Universe - College/University, Daddy Kink, Fluff, M/M, Marking, Masturbation, Nipple Piercings, Porn With Plot, Power Imbalance, Smut, Teacher-Student Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-13
Updated: 2020-05-13
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:55:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,217
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23987095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mincolla/pseuds/modricistas
Summary: three years and one semester.
Relationships: Julian Brandt/Kai Havertz
Comments: 9
Kudos: 31





	can we simply starve this sin?

**Author's Note:**

> general warnings: sexual and romantic student/teacher relationship (they're both adults ion want to hear it i'm putting the warning here), explicit sexual content
> 
> title is an obvious bmth reference, uh my tarantula's prob about to molt in a few weeks so that's cool but not related, shoutout to my friend rj for giving me the nipple piercing idea its HOT and im mad i didnt think of it lol, julian would be a gr8 daddy and no u can't change my mind, this took me like abt a week to write omg, and so uh thanks for reading & pls leave a comment bc im a whore for affirmationnnnnnnnn~
> 
> (also bc it's the closest thing i get to gettin paid for this)

The old Gregorian building is so vast and empty that Kai has to check both his map (to make sure he’s in the right place) and his watch (to make sure he isn’t late) multiple times before feeling satisfied that he hasn’t taken multiple wrong turns or slept through his alarm or something. He keeps counting the door numbers to find his lecture hall, resisting the urge to bask in the sunlight that’s just peaking through some morning clouds in time for noon because nothing could’ve prepared him for how cold Seattle got in the winter. There are a few professors standing around, drinking coffee and probably gossiping, and Kai just offers them awkward smiles as he heads up the last flight of stairs. He hopes that there’s an elevator somewhere in the old building because climbing three flights of stairs first thing in the morning - afternoon? - nearly every day of the week does not sound appealing. However, the first door he sees has the numbers 426 embossed next to them, and he heaves a sigh of relief, walking into the room. 

It’s completely empty, aside from a figure sitting on the desk at the front, nose deep in a book. Kai wonders if he’d read the class directory wrong, and starts to back out when his elbow hits the doorframe, startling both him and the other person in the room. They close the book and look up, squinting.

“Hi. Have a seat. I’m Professor Brandt, I hope you’re here for the twelve thirty ethics of medicine class, because I don’t know where anything else is.”

Kai swears internally for a second because Mario always warned him that this was going to happen, he was going to get stuck for a whole semester with a stupidly hot teacher, and he had managed to go three whole years and one semester completely safe from the ‘hot teacher’ curse. Brandt smiles awkwardly at him, extending a hand. Kai shakes his hand because he doesn’t trust his mouth and _shit_ he’s got really fucking long fingers and a really fucking nice face and he pulls his hand away like Brandt has burned him, offering an awkward, stilted smile.

“I’m, uh, Kai Havertz. Nice to meet you, Professor.” he says, shuffling to a seat towards the back and hoping more people show up soon. Other people start filtering around ten-till.

Brandt introduces himself to each person, shaking their hands and offering a slight smile. Kai drinks in how stupidly good he looks in a button-up and fitted dress pants and prays to God that the girl sitting next to him can’t see his boner through his track pants because that would really be one to explain his way out of. He distributes a syllabus before kicking off his lecture, and Kai manages to actually lose himself in the concept of ethics instead of eye-fucking his professor and staring at how he pushes his sleeves up past his elbows or runs a hand through his hair in frustration when a slide takes a few extra minutes to load. When they’re dismissed, Kai all but shoots out of his seat and sprints out of the lecture hall, bag half unzipped as he speeds to the bathroom.

Later that night, he commiserates with Serge and Mario over burnt frozen pizza.

“It’s so _unfair_ , I’m supposed to just sit through his class with no choice but to like, stare at him, for the rest of the year and I can’t touch?” he whines, reaching for Mario’s beer. Mario slaps his hand away.

“Season starts tomorrow for you, no beer.” Kai pouts. 

“You’ll live, you’re just dramatic,” Serge chimes in. “S’not like it’s the end of the world.”

“Okay, Serge, but it like, absolutely is.” 

“I mean, you’re _technically_ an ad-” Mario starts, but Serge cuts him off.

“Don’t even, if he gets thrown out for fucking a professor I’m _never_ gonna hear the end of it from Reus,” he says. 

“Hold on, thrown out?” Kai says. “He’s probably not even, y’know, I’ll just… Admire. And pretend like I totally didn’t get a boner in his class today.”

The apartment door opens and closes, and Emma steps in, holding up a bag of donuts. 

“I’ve got donuts and I smell drama, what’s going on?” she asks, kicking Mario in the shin until he scoots over and makes room for her on the couch.

“Kai’s gonna try to fuck his ethics teacher.” Emma chokes on her bite of pizza.

“Ethics? Not a very arousing class, Havertz.” she snorts, coughing a bit. “Anyways, the best way to do it is fail a minor assignment and then just stay after class and, y’know…” 

She makes a lewd gesture with her hands, waggling her eyebrows and grinning comically. 

“Emma!” Serge scolds from her other side. She looks at him innocently.

“What? I’m just trying to help a friend get laid, we all know he needs it.” 

Now it’s Kai’s turn to protest, but there’s no getting through to Emma as she steals away the rest of Mario’s beer and the conversation turns to how Coach Reus is probably sleeping with Emma’s art history professor, which Mario is sure can’t be true because he’s ninety nine percent sure Reus is gay. Kai rolls his eyes at that while Emma and Serge take turns ribbing Mario about why he even cares if he’s gay, and Mario flicks pizza grease at them. 

Thankfully, the football season starts, and soon Kai’s so tired every time he’s in Professor Brandt’s class that he can’t even bring himself to check him out, more concentrated on keeping his head from falling on his desk and passing out right then and there, and when he does, the girl next to him is kind enough to kick him so that nobody else notices he’s passed out in the middle of a lecture. Thankfully, it seems like Brandt doesn’t notice or doesn’t care, because he doesn’t call Kai on it, and they manage to have very minimal contact. Which is good. Less contact means less dealing with awkward rushes of blood to places they should _not_ be going in the middle of a lecture about how slavery ruined Western healthcare. 

Until right before the state final, as Kai’s all but out of class to avoid Brandt and also to get a nap in before he has to go to training, when Brandt puts a hand on his shoulder and asks him to stay back for a minute. His heart beats faster than it ever has, and he shoves every wildly inappropriate thought that immediately runs to the front of his mind into a corner because _no_ , his professor is not about to let him ride him in his office chair even though he really wouldn’t say no if he asked… 

“Kai. Kai. Hey, stay with me, yeah?” Brandt says, waving a hand in front of Kai’s face. Kai stumbles a little and Brandt catches him, quickly steadying him. 

“Why don’t you have a seat,” he says, quickly pulling a chair from the first row of seats and setting it across from his desk. Kai sits down automatically, leg bouncing as Brandt sits down at his desk, observing, just kind of staring at him. He looks away from his professor and at his hands. 

“You, uh, wanted to speak to me, Professor?” he mumbles, and Brandt leans forward a little.

“Yes, it’s nothing severe, I just… I heard from your coach, Mr. Reus, that he had some… Concerns about your health due to an event last season. He didn’t specify what, but he just asked me to tell you that if you need to be excused from an assignment, just speak to the counselor on campus for one or get an off-campus referral from a psychologist or psychiatrist. As a professor of a course about medical ethics, I really would hate for any work to weigh negatively on your mental state.” Brandt explains, offering a slight smile. “And, please, call me Julian.”

“Oh. Um… Thanks for letting me know, Pr- Julian.” Kai says, and Julian smiles a little bigger. His heart leaps stupidly and Kai can just _hear_ Emma’s voice calling him a pussy. 

So he goes for it. 

“Really, thanks, and, um, if you want to come see us play at the state final… I have a spare because one of my friends can’t make it. It’s next week, Thursday, at seven. It’s a home game.” 

Julian raises his eyebrows slightly. “Really? I’d love to. Thank you, Kai. Go get some rest now. Don’t think I haven’t seen you sleeping in my class.” 

Kai blushes and thanks him once again before heading back to his dorm, semi-hard and heart thumping so hard he thinks he can feel it in his brain. He gets a text halfway back from Serge telling him that training’s been cancelled because Reus thinks they should be resting up instead, and another text saying he’s staying at his girlfriend’s, the apartment is empty, and he’s left the door unlocked. He texts Serge back saying he’ll be around soon and thanks for not locking him out, and starts speedwalking for the complex.

He’s practically running by the time he reaches the gates of the complex, waving his ID in front of the card reader and hoping the on-duty security guard doesn’t notice his semi. He sprints up the stairs to his building and all but throws himself onto his bed, shoes abandoned by the door and jacket on the couch. Every bit of him wants to fall asleep then and there, but when he closes his eyes he just sees Julian’s stupid fucking face and the tired little curl that had made its way onto his forehead because he’d been too distracted lecturing to push it away. He rolls over and shoves his face into his pillows, screaming muffled - he hopes - as he tries to will away his semi and just sleep peacefully.

He lays still for a while, just breathing heavily, groaning in frustration. Eventually, he caves, rolls back over and reaches for his laptop. He just needs a distraction, something to blow off steam, something to just help him relax, and soon there’s a slightly sketchy porn site loading on his screen. He wants to find someone who looks nothing like Julian, a petite, brunette girl, maybe, and so he looks for exactly that. Stumbles onto some cam girl’s stream and lazily starts getting himself off, eyes lidding as he tries to satisfy the itch burning underneath his skin, threatening to melt through the skin and muscle and reduce him to bones, but it just isn’t satisfied. Not by some girl that looks nothing like the man whose name is just on the tip of his tongue, crawling up his throat, coming out in a choked off groan. 

Kai shuts his laptop and flops back against his bed, groaning in frustration. The thrum of hot blood runs through him, like a liquid pulse, beating from head to toe. He huffs out a breath, wrapping a loose fist around himself and jerking slowly, forcing his eyes open until the coil in his stomach tightens impossibly, and he caves, thighs trembling from holding back as he tightens his grip and throws his head back, breath catching, stuttering as his eyes close. He feels around the bedside table for something to ease the friction and sinks into his mattress, mind immediately tuning into the slightly concerned look Julian had on his face and his smile. 

The image flickers and he’s smiling in an entirely different way. Smirking, really, as deft fingers dance over shirt buttons and unveil pale, slightly pink skin. With his shirt fully unbuttoned, Julian’s hands leave his own chest and Kai can practically feel their burning grip as his eyelids twitch and holy _shit_ , Julian’s fully naked and his hands are shoving Kai’s thighs apart, grip bruising and movements harsh, contrasting with the soft, almost tender look on his face before he leans down and presses a string of hot, open-mouthed kisses over Kai’s neck, teeth just barely scraping over the skin. He feels himself shudder, almost bites his lip to hold in the words threatening to force their way out as his slick hand meets hot skin, hips moving in tight, tense thrusts into his fist as not-Julian kisses across his collarbones and sinks his teeth into skin, sucking a deep purple bruise right under his collarbone. Kai can practically feel the dull pain of a bite and bruise and his dick twitches slightly at it, hips stuttering as one of Julian’s hands leaves his thigh and dances over his lips. 

In real time, he parts his lips, gasping. Behind his eyes, Julian slips two fingers past his lips, fucking them in and out of Kai’s mouth like they’re his dick. When he retracts them, Kai whines, and Julian smirks, spit-slick fingers dragging down Kai’s bare chest, leaving goosebumps in their wake. Julian’s hand wraps loosely around his dick, working in time with Kai’s own fist, slow, loose strokes.

  
“F-fuck…” Kai’s voice cracks, needily thrusting faster into his own fist. In his mind, Julian releases his cock and trails his hand even lower, a hand throwing Kai’s left leg over his shoulder. 

His fingers dig into Kai’s thigh, leaving dream bruises, and Kai whines, hips canting desperately and back starting to arch as not-Julian shuffles closer between his thighs and kneels down, breath hot and heavy over the sharp lines of his hipbones. A very real path of goosebumps is left across his lower stomach as his mouth dances dangerously close to the head of Kai’s dick, tongue leaving teasing kisses and Kai’s hips jerk forwards on their own accord. One of Julian’s hands comes to his hip, grip bruising as he pushes down, pressing Kai’s hips into the bed, anchoring him there.

Kai whimpers as Julian’s lips part and he can practically _feel_ the warm, wet heat of his mouth, wrapped around his cock like a vice. He bites his lip as Julian’s head moves up and down in time with his fist, blue eyes all tinged with lust, tongue pressed up against the underside of his dick, one hand still pressing bruises into his hip while the other one digs into the thigh slung over Julian’s shoulder. He whines, fist jerking faster as Julian takes him all the way down, head pressing against the back of his throat and Kai has to bite his lip to hold in the groans of Julian’s name and his pleas for _more_ , _more_ , _Julian_ , _please_ , _I_ need _it_ , because he’s really not interested in getting a noise complaint because he couldn’t be quiet while jerking off thinking of his professor. 

His hips stutter again and Julian pulls off, and no amount of lip biting could contain the long, keening whine that forces itself from Kai’s throat as he imagines Julian’s fist working him over and over, face flushed and lips pink and raw and eyes gleaming with a possessive edge that’s enough to send Kai off the cliff he’s been teetering on. He cums harder than he thinks he ever has, groaning Julian’s name and some choice expletives. 

He lies, boneless, for a second, brain so spectacularly fucked out that he’s pretty sure he’s never going to be able to get it up again in his life. 

The next time he’s in Julian’s class, he doesn’t look up once, shoves his face into his laptop and focuses on taking the most diligent - and only - notes of the entire semester. He doesn’t even realize he’s fallen asleep on his keyboard until there’s a hand on his shoulder and he looks up and there’s Julian, standing over him, smiling with his stupid fucking face and his glasses messing up his hair, and the way that he’s looking at Kai makes him feel almost naked. Like he somehow _knows_ that twenty four hours ago, Kai was jerking off thinking of his hands and mouth edging him till he sobbed. 

“Fell asleep again, Kai,” Julian says, and Kai can tell he’s trying to admonish him, but the soft lowness of his voice is all he can focus on. 

“M’sorry, just… Was up kind of late last night.” he admits, shutting his laptop and shoving it into his bag. Julian makes a sympathetic face and Kai has to resist every urge in his body screaming at him to grab Julian’s loosened tie and pull him into a kiss that could cost him his degree and Julian his job. 

“Training?” Julian asks, and Kai just nods because he’d rather _not_ let his professor know he jerked off thinking about him. “Well, you can make it up to me.”

Kai crosses his legs and squeezes his thighs together _hard_ , praying that Julian doesn’t notice or he totally does and is about to fuck him in the back of the lecture hall - or, even better, on his desk - and tell him how _bad_ he’s been, _punish_ him… 

“Kai?” Julian waves his hand in front of his face. “Shit- I mean, shoot, you really are tired. Forget about the filing, go get some rest.”

He shakes his head, sitting up slightly. “No, really, I’m fine, uh, I’ll help you with the uh…”

“The filing,” Julian says. “Are you sure? You really should be getting rest, I’m still planning on going to that final.”

Kai bites the inside of his cheek so hard he’s pretty sure it’s going to bleed later, but he’s totally forgotten that he asked Julian to come to the final and now he’s pretty sure he won’t even be able to play because _how_ is he supposed to play when his stupidly hot ethics professor is watching _him_ , at the match because of _him_ , and Kai has to resist the urge to just slam his face into the desk and groan from how hard his dick is because this is really, really not the right time and if he has to deal with any more of Julian’s concerned face he’s pretty sure he’ll cum on the spot. Which would make the situation approximately four hundred times worse.

Julian sighs, dragging Kai out of his own head. “Okay, just… Come with me, my office is on the second floor.” 

His office is messy, papers and used coffee mugs strewn over every open surface. Kai shrugs his bag off, placing it near the couch in the corner of Julian’s office. 

“Here, uh, these are some files I need for my research. Organize them by year, I’ve already marked all the folders I just, uh, haven’t gotten around to organizing them.” Julian says, removing a drawer from the filing cabinet next to his desk. He places it on the couch, smiling sheepishly as Kai takes in the mess. He smiles back and starts sifting through the pages, carefully flattening out the papers as he sorts them, trying not to stare at Julian grading papers, glasses pushing his hair back, absentmindedly biting his lip. He pushes his sleeves up and unbuttons the top button of his shirt, and Kai inhales so sharply he coughs a little bit, offering a strained smile when Julian looks over at him with a cocked eyebrow. 

Julian insists on walking him back to his apartment, and Kai tries to not think about how much it feels like a date, about how he can feel Julian shooting looks his way every two seconds, about how much he hopes the apartment is empty, about how fucking hot Julian looks even when totally covered up in a grey coat and scarf, and then they’re standing outside his apartment building and Kai’s phone buzzes and it’s Serge, one text asking where he is, and another one saying the apartment’s going to be empty till tomorrow. Kai bites his lip.

“Do you, uh, want to come upstairs? It’s kinda cold, don’t want you to, uh, freeze.” he asks, and Julian smiles, a little half-smile, and steps closer, so close that Kai can see his eyelashes that flutter as he leans in, warm body pressing against Kai’s.

“I know what you’re doing.” he says, and then he leans back, heat suddenly gone and Kai has to push down a whine that bubbles up in his throat. “I… You’re my student, Kai. I just… I can’t…” 

Kai drops his head a little, nodding. He bites his lower lip, shoves his hands into his pockets to keep them off of Julian, off of his _professor_ for fuck’s sake, and lets out a shaky sigh, trying to fight off the urge to just throw himself at Julian like he’s desperate - he kind of is - because their imbalance suddenly hits him all at once. 

“Hope your wife isn’t too mad,” he says, lightly, but it doesn’t come out that way. Julian winces a little.

“I… I’m not married. Even if I was, it wouldn’t be to a woman.” he replies, and then he mumbles something else. It sounds vaguely like _fuck you_ , and then Kai’s pressed up against the exterior wall of his apartment building, rough cement digging into his back as Julian fists a hand in his hoodie and pulls him into a rough kiss. 

For a second, he’s so shocked that he forgets to even kiss back, but then his body slips into autopilot and he presses back against Julian’s mouth, hands feeling for a purchase on something as his stomach drops like he’s falling, and Julian groans and presses his hands against the concrete, hauling himself off of Kai. He doesn’t miss Julian’s quick glance at his lips, kissed red and raw, breath coming in heaves, fogging up the space between himself and the other man.

Julian’s eyes dart around quickly. “My car’s parked in the staff parking lot… I’ll be back in a second, just… Wait here.” 

Kai just nods, blindly, brain so clouded and breath quite literally stolen, and then Julian’s awkwardly half-sprinting off across the street and disappearing back onto campus, leaving Kai panting against the wall, unable to suppress the smile growing on his face. Moments later, a blue car comes to a stop in front of the building. Julian gets out and walks around to the passenger side, opening the door for Kai. 

They sit in silence, walk up the stairs of the porch in front of Julian’s house in silence, and stand in the entrance hallway in silence. Julian kicks off his shoes, lining them up neatly, and Kai does the same. He swears for a second that he hears Julian say something along the lines of _good boy_ , and it makes his heart flutter and dick twitch at the same time. He feels like every single one of his nerves have been doused in alcohol and set on fire, burning and rippling under his skin, and then Julian leans forward and puts a cold, solid hand on his cheek, thumb stroking over his cheekbone, tamping down the fire underneath his skin while the look in his eyes encourages it, adding more and more fuel. 

“ _Fuck_ , you’re beautiful,” Julian murmurs, and he leans in closer, hand resting on Kai’s cheek sliding to the back of his head, fisting into the short hairs there and pulling him down, drawing a sharp whimper from Kai’s throat that’s swallowed by Julian’s mouth on his, gentle, almost tender, compared to the stinging in Kai’s scalp as Julian tugs harder, other hand fisted in the fabric of Kai’s hoodie, drawing him in closer. Kai flattens his hands on Julian’s chest, frozen fingers trying to work the buttons of his coat, whining when he can’t. Julian releases Kai’s hair and hoodie, backing away for a second to swat his hands away and take his coat off.

“Patient,” he says, voice already slightly fucked out and Kai feels his knees buckle a little as Julian shrugs his coat off, draping it over a chair. “Bit overdressed, aren’t you?” 

Kai flushes pink, making light work of his hoodie and handing it to Julian, who’s staring at his chest, eyes hot. He squirms under his gaze, something low in his stomach sparking as Julian practically shoves him against the wall. He whines, something digging slightly into his back, as Julian mouths over his neck, leaving a little trail of open-mouthed kisses, and something about it feels weirdly familiar, like he’s felt it before. 

“Could break you in fucking half, shit,” Julian murmurs, breath hot and fanning over Kai’s neck as he mouths at his pulse point. “So pretty. You’d let me, wouldn’t you? Let me fucking wreck you.” 

He whimpers, mouth falling open, desperate noises spilling out as Julian’s hands rest on his hips, fingers digging into the skin through his sweatpants. 

“Yes, yes, please,” he pants, hips pushing back against Julian’s hands, straining to press against his. “Please, daddy.” 

The word hangs in the air as Julian backs off, hands still loosely sitting on Kai’s hips. He doesn’t even realize what he’s said for a second, and then he does. Flushing deep red, his hands move to push Julian’s away, but his grip tightens, so hard that Kai lets out a little whine at the pressure, and he notices the deep, almost predatory gleam in Julian’s eyes. Then there’s the warm, insistent press of something against his thigh and Kai gasps as Julian parts his thighs with his own, muscle nudging against Kai’s dick. He can’t think of anything to do other than grind down, all the blood in his body dragged away from his brain as his upper half slumps forward, head coming to rest on Julian’s shoulder. He tucks his face into the crook between Julian’s shoulder and his neck, mouth moving in sighs and whines as he grinds against his thigh, desperate, hands clawing at Julian’s back, still frustratingly covered by his dress shirt. 

Kai’s hands fly to the buttons of Julian’s shirt, brain too drained to properly undo each button. He makes a little frustrated noise that Julian half-coos, half-growls at, and he swats Kai’s hands away once again, pulling him further into the house. He blindly stumbles along, brain not quite working in time with the rest of him as Julian shoves him down onto a bed - _his_ bed - and kneels over him, one hand sliding up under the hem of Kai’s t-shirt, pushing it halfway up his chest as he leans down and presses kisses along the lower half of his chest. They start out chaste, almost loving, and then each kiss becomes accompanied by a kiss of Julian’s tongue, and then teeth, just the slightest amount of pressure as he bruises love bite after love bite along the waistband of Kai’s sweatpants, which have started riding dangerously low. Kai whines, one hand carding through Julian’s hair, trying to push him off because he wants, wants, wants _so_ badly, but his brain’s so gone he’s not even sure what he wants aside from _Julian_.

Julian seems to get a different message though, fingers dancing over the tops of Kai’s waistband, dipping under to brush against the heated skin underneath for a few moments before hooking on the elastic and teasingly dragging the fabric down just slightly and then pulling it back up. Kai whines, needing to get something on his dick, a hand, a mouth, _anything_ , and just as he opens his mouth to beg, one of Julian’s hands abandons its ministrations over Kai’s lower chest and teases his cock through the fabric of his sweatpants and briefs, fingers just lightly working, not enough friction or pressure to be satisfactory, but enough to tease, slowly pulling Kai to the edge but not letting him go over just yet. His hips jerk off the bed, impatient, and Julian tuts, removes both his hands and hauls himself up, leaning over Kai with a smirk. 

“Patience,” he murmurs, one hand grabbing the hem of Kai’s shirt and pulling it up. “Get this off.” 

Kai sits up, pulling his shirt off and throwing it onto the floor, leaning back onto his elbows as Julian sat back, unbuttoning his shirt but not taking it off quite yet. He leans forward, kissing up Kai’s chest and stopping just below his collarbones. One hand runs over Kai’s bare chest, feeling the warm skin and Kai swears that Julian’s just marvelling at him. A finger catches on something, and Julian raises his eyebrows, looking up at Kai. 

“What’s this?” he asks, fingers toying with Kai’s piercing. He whines, arching into Julian’s touch. 

“S’ a piercing.” he gasps.

“Hm, bet it makes you really sensitive,” Julian remarks, pinching. Kai gasps again, keening as Julian’s mouth drops down, from his collarbones to mouthing at his nipple, tongue toying with the piercing. Kai groans as he threads his fingers in Julian’s hair, pulling him up and into a bruising kiss.

Julian’s hands go to Kai’s thighs, pushing them apart as he nips at his lower lip, pulling Kai in closer. He feels the insistent pressure of Julian’s dick against the front of his sweatpants, grinding against him, while the wet heat of Julian’s mouth swallows his sounds. 

“Fuck,” Julian groans as they part.

“Need you naked. Now.” he mumbles, quickly dragging down Kai’s sweatpants and briefs, licking his lips as even more skin is revealed to him. Kai writhes under his gaze, hands fisting in the sheets as Julian finally puts a hand on his aching dick. 

“Daddy, please, ple… A-ah!” Kai whines, cut off by Julian grabbing his thigh roughly and lifting, propping his leg up over his shoulder. The head of his dick just barely pushes against Kai’s rim, not penetrating him just yet, but proving that he _could_. Kai melts at the easy display of dominance, blood running hot as Julian taps three of his fingers against Kai’s lips before prying his mouth open and fucking them into his mouth. He gags around Julian’s fingers, dick twitching because it’s just like he imagined, Julian’s composed dominance, choking him with a slight grin and almost teasing gleam in his eye, daring him to really land himself in it. 

Julian pulls his fingers out of Kai’s mouth, slick with spit, teases them down his chest, just barely brushing his dick with the back of his hand before slipping in one finger, knuckle-deep, and Kai jerks, squirming around the intrusion with a whine. Once he adjusts, Julian adds another.

“More, _more_ , holy…” Kai whines, hips riding back onto Julian’s hand, fucking himself on his fingers. Julian’s free hand pins his hips to the bed.

“ _You_ don’t call the shots around here, baby boy,” he growls. Kai whimpers weakly, needy sounds forcing themselves from his throat as Julian curls his fingers, just shy of hitting right where Kai wants them, _needs_ them, and if it weren’t for the heavy, bruising hand still on his hip, he would be able to writhe just so that he’d probably cum from just Julian’s fingers and nothing else.

Finally, Julian caves and crooks his fingers just the tiniest bit more, and Kai gasps, back arching off the bed and heel digging into Julian’s back, one arm draped over his eyes while his other hand clenches in the sheets, twisting and crumpling the pale blue fabric in his fist. 

“Fuck, _yes_ , daddy, oh my _God_ ,” he gasps, pushing back against the hand on his hip, trying to fuck himself down onto Julian’s fingers even more. Instead, Julian removes his fingers altogether, leaning down to teasingly kiss the crease of Kai’s thighs, earning another needy gasp, hips jerking so sharply that it displaces Julian’s hand. 

Julian _growls_ , actually growls, and Kai whimpers.

“You want it so badly, don’t you?” he muses, pressing against Kai’s rim. “So fucking _desperate_.”

“Daddy, _please_ ,” Kai whines, pushing back against Julian’s dick. “Fuck me.”

Julian pulls back, and Kai can hear the rip of plastic and the sound of him rolling the condom on, spitting, and slicking up his cock before he gently reaches over and lowers the arm draped over his face, taking in the way Kai’s eyes widen and then squeeze shut as he slowly, carefully presses into him, one hand steadying the trembling leg hitched over his shoulder and the other hand rubbing gentle circles into his hip, thumb tracing rounds over the sharp jut of his hipbone. Kai groans, tears pricking at the corners of his eyes, the burn and stretch of Julian feeling like it will split him in half, and for a tender moment, Julian leans down and peppers kisses over his face, hips slowly dragging back before bearing down on Kai again. Julian moves, slowly, for a few moments, and Kai bites down on his lip to contain the pleas that desperately want to come forth, beg Julian to fuck him _harder_ and _faster_ , chasing the heady burn that flares up in his stomach every time Julian gets a little rougher. 

“C’mon, princess, let me hear you.” Julian rasps, hands coming to Kai’s hips and pulling him back into his thrusts. He whimpers at the pet name, an embarrassingly high, keening moan forcing itself from his throat as Julian gets even rougher. 

Kai goes to grab his cock and work himself in time with Julian, who instead slaps his hand away and pins it to the bed. 

“Daddy,” Kai protests, hips jerking back into Julian’s. “Daddy, please, I… I _need_ …”

Julian fucking _smirks_ , changes his angle just slightly and Kai’s writhing on the bed again, fists clenched in the sheets, moans coming in short, stuttered breaths as he pushes back into Julian’s hips, fucking himself on his dick. 

“Good boy,” Julian praises, rewarding him with a spit-slick hand and a warm smile that makes something burn in the pit of his stomach. Kai jerks up into Julian’s fist, on the verge of sobbing as Julian moves his fist in time with his hips, quickly dragging him to the edge. 

“I’m… Fuck, _fuck_ , I’m gonna…” Kai moans, head falling back as he cums. Julian fucks him through his orgasm, leaning down to bite at the juncture between his shoulder and his neck, leaving a bruise in the wake of his teeth as he cums.

Breathless, Julian carefully flops onto the bed next to Kai, heaving. Kai practically melts into the bed, breath gone and bones reduced to absolutely nothing. Julian carefully grabs his thigh and squeezes it, once, almost tenderly before rolling off the bed and disappearing into the bathroom. Half asleep, Kai props himself up on the bed, head resting against the pillows that smell distinctly like Julian, brain too foggy and sluggish to really do anything else. He vaguely feels something warm and wet on his chest, followed by warm hands pulling him over onto a warm body. Julian plants a kiss on his forehead and murmurs something too quiet for his hardly conscious brain to interpret. 

He wakes up draped over a still half-naked Julian, who stirs slightly as Kai slowly gets out of bed, carefully trying not to disturb him as he walks across the room to where his sweatpants were discarded. His phone is in the left pocket, and he feels his stomach drop when he sees the sheer amount of missed calls and texts from his housemates. The most recent call is from Mario, so he calls him back first, praying that they haven’t done anything crazy like call the police or told his parents that he’s gone missing.

Mario picks up after the first ring and immediately launches into a barrage of questions. “Kai? Holy shit, are you okay? Are you alive? Where are you?” 

“I’m okay, I’m alive, don’t… Don’t worry about me,” he says. “Please just tell me you guys didn’t like, report me as missing or anything.”

“Emma was thinking about it, but someone said they’d seen you outside the building with some guy?” Mario replies. Kai feels his stomach drop again, and he sways for a second, feeling nauseous. 

“I… Did they recognize him?” he asks, urgently. 

“No, just said they saw you, uh, kissing him. Did you seriously bunk off with some random guy and give us all a heart attack for a guy?” Mario says, sounding a bit exasperated and a bit accusatory. 

“I didn’t _mean_ to,” Kai defends. “We just got kinda… Carried away.”

“Good,” Mario mutters. “Okay, well, thanks for finally deciding to let us know you’re okay. Emma’s been worried sick, so maybe call her and let her know that at least you got laid.”

“Okay, yeah, I’ll do that,” he says, looking over his shoulder to make sure Julian’s still asleep. “Is she still at home?”

“Yeah, don’t call her right now, but do it sometime today, alright? She might actually call the cops if you don’t.” Mario warns. “Be safe.” 

He hangs up, and Kai spares one more glance at Julian before silently walking around the room, trying to gather all of his clothes. He dresses quietly, looking around for a pen and paper, quickly scrawling a note and getting an Uber back to his apartment. His hoodie is still folded on top of Julian’s coat, but it’s strangely warm, so he forgoes actually putting it on before slipping out of the house and sitting on the steps leading up to the porch. 

**Author's Note:**

> comment and leave kudos if it strikes your fancy  
> [here's somewhere to support my writing in other ways!](https://ko-fi.com/toady)


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